in math today my teacher asked what makes a number perfect and I said its dazzling personality and she almost kicked me out
everything good makes you fat an addict or broke
Let me just say, just because you eat healthily and work out doesn’t necessarily mean you ARE healthy
Being afraid of sugar, a piece of cake, or anything not clean is not “healthy”
Being pissed and anxious and upset and mad at yourself for missing one day of working out is not “healthy”
Your entire life revolving around food, exercising and being healthy is not “healthy”
Just putting that out there
the most perfect post in the world
it must be really wild to actually have a positive relationship with your father
some people really have that????
me starting to like someone
also there were like way too many sexual jokes in teenage mutant turtles. not that there were A LOT but hearing a teenage mutant ninja turtle say “she’s so hot i can feel my shell getting tight” is not something i ever wanted to hear and now that i have i cannot unhear it
what if Jesus had a middle name
and it was something really lame, like Harold.
"JESUS HAROLD CHRIST. COME HERE THIS INSTANT AND CLEAN YOUR ROOM."
"But MOOOMMM I’m healing a blind man!"
"DON’T MAKE ME GET YOUR FATHER"
“We are here to serve & protect”
Someone I’m related said this:
"I was a policeman before this job, and I moved in to this [other line of work] because I got used to being able to hit something if it annoyed me."
Disorder caused by the orderly.
this is so important
u think i am walking around the house with a blanket around my shoulders because i cold but in actuality it is my cloak and i am on an adventure
HOW do white people wear shoes inside the house i dont understand that scares me so much